Economics and the Sphygnomanometer

Your father was sent home from work Friday
His blood pressure was too high to participate in training
Then you texted him for money
He doesn't know when he will be able to go back to work again
And told him he was making your life difficult
because he wouldn't transfer money to your checking account so you could go tan
You didn't know what was going on with him at the time
I hate to say it but it seems like you wouldn't give 2 shits anyway

Oh, here's a fun fact for you - that was the 1 year anniversary of the physically, mentally, verbally, and emotionally abusive incedent that caused you to move into our house
So theoretically that was the first day of the year that almost killed my marriage
And the beginning of the end of who I believed you to be

We picked you up at your mother's house where you now reside
at 9 on Saturday Morning
To take you to have some candid senior pictures taken at the campus of my Alma Mater
Not sure if you realize that we werent sure you would show up
unless we physically transported you ourselves
You graduate in less than 2 weeks
You are legally an adult
Most kids got theirs done a year ago

Your dad set up the photographer, time, and location for your pictures
and paid for all of it after you were done
Then we all went to eat
and promptly delivered you back to your mothers

We have been informed that we are to have a party for you the day after graduation
We also have been informed that we are expected
to send out your graduation announcements
that are supposed to use the pictures from Saturday
So I assume further that we are expected to just whip these out
After you pick the picture you want to use

Your father called you this afternoon
After you flaked out on coming here as usual
I expected you would not show up

Like clockwork you let the call go to voicemail
As usual he left you a message saying to give him a call when you got the message
Three hours later, he called you again
and again left you a voice mail to please call him tonight

He has to go in first thing in the morning to get his blood pressure rechecked
Which will determine whether he can even work or not
Perhaps you did not understand what I was telling you on Saturday
About your father's situation and how he needs to not be upset or have conflict
At least until he is cleared to go back to work

You got an acceptance letter to a JC this week
You said you are going to go there
Apparently one of the morons you befriended after you stopped coming home over here
is going there too

Her parents love you because you inspired her to do something with her life
which tells me that her aspirations were meager
You talk to her mom on the phone
apparently ya'll text all the time
That's great
Your dad just has one sided conversations
with your voicemail
and sends unrequieted text messages
To a phone he pays for

There was mention of making a trip to the JC (in my hometown )
with your bff/roomie/whatever
and her parents
to fill out forms and enroll you two
No clue as to when this is to take place

You do realize that should something "unsatisfactory" happen with your father's job
Our cash flow will cease
Which means tuition, tanning, gas, allowance
and other miscellaneous freebies that should have stopped out of principle 3 months ago
Will no longer be available

While I can only guess how you would react if something like that were to occur
I have always tried - and then tried to try to give you the benefit of the doubt
But if I were a bettin' woman
I would put my wager that the spoiled brat attitude of entitlement would be first on the scene

There is still a part of me that half assed believes that you don't know or understand
what has actually occurred over the last 6 months
That part of me is also telling myself that you are who I thought you were all along
And that surely if you were aware of everything
(your mother's manipulation and undermining your father to punish him for letting you live here made possible by granting you carte blanche and making it easy for you to opt out of seeing, speaking to, or visiting your dad.
(unless, of course he is taking you skiing, shopping, or giving you $)

You would STOP IT

So dance, little marionette -
the freedom you now enjoy
devoid of responsibility or accountability
is all a part of the show
The opus of the puppetmaster
It is her most fulfilling (and only) work your mother has done in nearly 2 decades
But there is no denouement in this production
She won't have any part of that

This is her script, you know

And we are the players on her stage

Making it reality

When reality comes crashing down on you
and you look up at your umbelical strings to pull you up
the game is over
and the puppetmaster assumes no responsibility and can not be held liable
for any harm or injury that may have occurred
during the run of this production
Your voluntary participation in the production
releases the aforementioned puppetmaster (hereinafter referred to as "mom")
from any and all liability claims, including but not limited to
anger
guilt
shame
rage
psychological or emotional trauma
shattered self image

Self Doubt

Stunting of emotional growth

foregone dreams

unattained goals

never having your own life

Coincedently, once she yells "cut!"
"That's a wrap"
she means it

It is ashamed that it turned out this way
for you
but it is even more ashamed
that your dad
(you remember him... the guy that left you those annoying messages)
being the person he is
and being the kind of father he is
will have to do the best he can
to one day sift through what remains of you
and salvage what is left